The Third Slip: Issue 179 - Apology Apogee
Hello, Slippers! Welcome to The Third Slip - the weekly newsletter that is like your adhoc chair which holds all your clean laundry. It’s not the most ideal instrument but it gets the job done, it collects things in a messy pile over 7 days, and you only need to take a cursory look at it before you file it away, and before you know it, it fills up again. But you know what they say about clean laundry - it’s Comfort-ing.
This is issue 179, or as they call it in Hindi एक सौ उनासी. Which is also what you say when you scroll through your timeline, chance upon someone you used to date and see that they've turned into a bigot. Ex? O! U Nazi! Bullet dodged. But not the news...
At Home
Shaheen Bagh Raha Hai
Apparently 50 activists from the Shaheen Bagh protests joined the BJP and AAP says the protest site was built by the saffron party to boost electoral chances. LOLwut? Meanwhile, the key volunteers from the amorphous Shaheen Bagh protests say that those who joined the BJP were not a part of the movement. This is turning into a Priyadarshan movie which has reached the point of ever-increasing nonsense and confusion that you should walk out of, but can’t because "think of all the kids in Africa who don’t even get to watch movies."
Tab-likhi ab kya?: The Bombay High Court this week quashed FIRs against the Tablighi Jamaat attendees and accused the government of attempting to make them a scapegoat. The court also observed that there was “big”, “unwarranted” “media propaganda” to spread hatred against a community. Good news, but who cares? The pandemic started long ago and even your normally reasonable parents were convinced that they were to be blamed and this belated judgment is not going to change much. Should have stopped it before it happened.
Bloomsburied: In “stopped it just as it was about to take wings” news, a seemingly ridiculous Book on the Delhi riots that took place in Feb 2020 was withdrawn by the publisher Bloomsbury India after much online protests. The title of the book could have been “A dummy’s guide to carrying out a state sponsored pogrom and blaming the victims” and it got stalled only because they had the audacity to organise a launch with Kapil Mishra without the publisher’s knowledge. For now, the only part of the book that remains is the spine. Bravo.
The ball is in your Supreme Court
Like how Elon Musk gets his knickers in a twist because of some guy tweeting at him, or how a newsletter co-author might mandate no more obscure prog-metal jokes, figures of authority react irrationally badly for silly things. In unrelated news, the Supreme Court of India charged Prashant Bhushan with contempt of court for two tweets, instead of y’know dealing with things like 370 and CAA. Even the Attorney General (who normally sides with the government) was not pleased. Whatever, we’ll do what we want. This week, hilariously, PB took them up on their offer asking them to do what they wanted while the SC almost begged him to reconsider. So in that spirit of good-natured rebellion, one Symphony X joke for 2 people: Courting? Oh Romeo!
Illustration by Harini Kannan
Effacebook: The fallout of the WSJ report of Facebook’s India team not taking action against posts inconvenient to the government has been predictable. Its India CEO has said “Ey no ya, what ya, nothing like that ya”. Meanwhile, its employees are starting to dissent slightly.
Arindamn son!: Remember Arindam Chaudhuri? Well after finally having to shut down IIPM in 2015, our man has now been arrested for tax evasion. Looks like he will have to go to jail or um… pony up. Heh.
Around the world
Hey it’s a pro-test, not a con-test: It seems there are protests everywhere. Partially bored but mostly because the world is run by buffoons, people around the world are taking to the streets. A runthrough: Belarus & Mali (over ‘stolen’ elections), Beirut (government’s incompetence that led to the blast), Bulgaria, Iraq, Bangkok, Bolivia, Zimbabwe (they all hate the government), Hong Kong (fuck China), Tel Aviv (over a kid’s gangrape), Brazil (by indigeneous populations)... Phew!
Biden his time: A Joe Biden who’s never looked more confident is officially the Dems’ Presidential nominee (and because Kamala Harris is his running mate, he has the support of Indian Whatsapp groups, especially Tamil ones). This happened at a virtual, star-cast Democratic National Convention. Actually not all were stars. One was a 13-year old kid who had a stutter, much like Biden once did. Powerful. Kudos to Biden, he’s managed to unite a fractious party, even if everyone’s common goal is getting Trump out of the White House. Who by the way, it turns out, DID collude with Russia, but at this point, nobody cares. Heck, his former campaign advisor Steve Bannon was arrested for fraud (in India, that means he would have been made a minister).
Clock and dagger: China is all set for a periodical purge of “disloyal” people from leadership in the next two years. It’s called “drive the blade in” which even in euphemistic form sounds dangerous. No surprise then that intelligence increasingly shows Chinese officials hid virus news from Beijing in early 2020 for fear of reprisal. But hey, there are now rave parties in Wuhan. Guess everything is back to normal!
What did you Putin it?: A prominent Putin critic is in coma after ingesting suspicious tea. Most likely for his anti-Kremlin activism. And you thought the phrase poisonous chaiwalla was mere conjecture.
Pak up!: It looks like Saudi Arabia is getting Riyadh of Pakistan. The long time allies have drifted apart as Saudi Arabia looks to India as a strategic partner. The breakup is not pretty with Saudi demanding back the mixtape bailout money it gave to Pak.
Corona Corner
Eye on the needle: Vaccine trials are speeding up, and Bill Gates has predicted the end of the virus by 2021. Time your getting back in shape schedule accordingly.
Blank balance: Sadly in India, the majority are walking a tightrope. It’s a case of which will get you first - the virus or poverty. Migrants are coming back to cities in search of work even as it’s emerged almost 20M salaried jobs have been lost.
Seoul Searching: In South Korea, conservative Christians who believe the current government is going to take them back to Godless Communism congregated in a church and yup, you guessed it, promptly triggered a covid outbreak. Clearly, altar-natives are not the alternative.
Frat shaming: Pandemic shmandemic. Frat parties are on in US colleges. And college students are packing bars without masks. No prizes for guessing the eventual outcome. Is this why they call it the fall semester?
Hot Techs
The cart wants what the cart wants: You know how the pandemic bores you so much that from time to time and you end up shopping online for things that you really don’t need? Well, Jio wants to buy everything - Milkbasket, UrbanLadder, TikTok India…
Putting the Larry in Hilarious: So… after Microsoft expressed interest, Oracle might buy TikTok?! (Maybe not surprising? They’ve been cozy with the WH and Larry Elisson is a Trump supporter)
Alt+F4: Finally, Microsoft is bidding goodbye to Internet Explorer. Funnily enough, IE won’t even be the most annoying thing that MS has killed. Remember Clippy?
LinkedOut
Inevitable that Covid-19 will work its way into TV shows
How Covid will impact the kind of music that’s being made
Making the vaccine a national race is dangerous
That’s all for this week. If you’d like, you can get in touch: Instagram (Chuck | Tony), Twitter (Chuck | Tony), email. And if you REALLY like us and can afford to, consider supporting us on UPI, Instamojo or Patreon. Until next week, may your lockdown life arrange itself into sections that come together beautifully like Ikebana. Bye!