The Third Slip: Issue 175 - For God's Saket
Hello, Slippers! Welcome to The Third Slip. The weekly newsletter that sounds like a broken record, but never breaks any records. We continue to set the bar low and pass under it which would have been impressive if we were part of a Limbo contest, but as it turns out we’re just in limbo.
This is issue 175. 175, of course, is the number of runs Kapil Dev scored while walking in with the score at 17/5. An epic innings, which pretty much changed the course of the 1983 World Cup, and with it, cricketing history. Sadly, this unparalleled feat was never recorded and remains a great loss to humanity. So we’ve decided to chronicle everything that happens in the world even if it's done badly. The news...
Around the world
You’d think the virus would slow down the news so we could have a shorter newsletter for once. No chance. So we’re splitting things up into three easy-to-consume segments, in increasing levels of surprisingness.
Things that should not at all be surprising
Not the year of the dragon: China’s not the most popular kid in the geopolitical playground at the moment. The UK accused it of human rights abuses (“lolz”, UK’s ‘colonial friends’ might say), their consulate in the US was forcibly closed, and Secretary of State Mike Pompeo is promoting ‘Unity Against China’. Why not, it’s not like they can unleash a virus to seek revenge or anything.
Biden his time: Trump’s ratings continue to sink. Even his $1b spending in his reelection campaign might not be enough. In today’s soundbyte-and-keep-making-news environment, Joe Biden might have found the perfect formula to success: Just keep quiet.
Do you even Cairo?: Yes, there can be a crisis anywhere if you look hard enough. Egypt and Ethiopia might go to war over the Nile.
Teching them to the cleaners: Big Tech CEOs will be grilled by lawmakers (some of whom, we hope, understand tech) in August in what should be a showdown for the ages. (All of them have been on their best behaviour, such as committing to climate change goals, or taking down extremist accounts). Each has had a hard time of late. Apple has states / countries investigating them for deceiving customers, and antitrust. Twitter saw poor earnings, a week after its worst hacking. None of this would have happened if they had just listened to themselves - Don't be evil.
Let’s get ready to Saket: Saket Gokhale has been exemplary in showing us how to take on the establishment. He has single-handedly filed more ballsy RTIs that are inconvenient to the establishment (pssst BJP) than we have made bad puns. And of course, he has now received death threats and rioters outside his home. Even so, his subversive genius continues to get the better of the morons in power. But, this is dangerous and we’re reminded of Vikram Joshi, a journalist in UP, who was shot by thugs despite having placed a call to the police well in advance. In other “yeah we expected that” news from our shores: The government shrunk eco-sensitive zones in Assam for make benefit glorious PSU of Oil India; textbooks have been BJPwashed (our only hope is kids reading TTS. Quick, send this to a 5th grader near you).
We are not WoRTI 🙇🏾♂️ 🙇🏾♂️ 🙇🏾♂️
Illustration by Harini Kannan
Things that might have been surprising in 2015 but hey this is 2020!
Portlandia: The liberal/hipster American city of Portland has seen massive protests over racism for two months, enough for Trump to send in in federal troops. (Think of it like the white version of MHA sending in cops to disperse an anti-CAA rally outside Republic TV’s office in Lower Parel).
Quite a reception: A cafe in Manchester got 1000 applicants for a receptionist post. Meanwhile, Indian railways applicants are lolzing.
Taken to Cortez: AOC had an epic reply when abused by a batty old Republican, making the GOP look more like racist, misogynistic white ol’ grampas.
Erdocando attitude: Turkey’s leader is using the war in Libya to show the Western world he means business (and make a lot of money off oil in the process)
Different strokes, different folks: Bezos adds $13b in one day, meanwhile Greta Thunberg gives 1m euro prize away to climate groups.
Assembly Line: Ah, Rajasthan! What could symbolize Indian politics more than some old farts from the Congress staging a dharna for a floor test as one of their own threatens to leave for the BJP, all in the middle of a pandemic? Makes you wanna dig up the “pros and cons of democracy” chart.
Continued Reliance: Mukesbai’s empire just keeps going from strength to strength on the basis of its past strength. Amazon wants to buy a 9.9% stake in its retail wing.
And finally, things that are… completely surprising
Joke him: Weirdest hostage thing in Ukraine. The captor (an animal rights activist) let everyone go after the President asked everyone to watch Earthlings, a 2005 Joaquin Phoenix Film
Aye Aye AI: OpenAI released GPT3, a new version of its machine learning technology, and it’s probably the most advanced AI out there. It’s worth checking out its implications. This is absolutely bonkers.
Tikked Off: TikTok’s not having a happy time. It pulled out of talks with the UK Government to make London its non-China HQs, Trump’s using FB ads to bash it, and Pompeo referenced it in his ‘Unity Against China’ speech. And Pakistan is considering a ban too. Reels it is for now, content creators.
Commission impossible: Women officers can now get permanent commission in Indian Army.
A word
Assam & Bihar have seen some terrible, terrible floods which doesn’t make the news because we’re now numb to it. Please donate if you can.
Coronadhona
Aap ko cases mehsus ho rha hai?: The virus isn’t going anywhere. India is seeing crazy levels of spikes, touching 50k new cases per day. At least our testing rate is increasing and we have a good recovery rate (even if we’re the only country who seems to care about that metric). MIT estimates we’ll be the worst-hit country by the end of next year (with 287000 cases per day by Feb!). Why are we paying rent in Mumbai again?
The mask doesn’t add up: In the US things are so bad even Trump is advocating wearing masks now. Clusters keep popping up in China. They are also busy hacking coronavirus research (wasn’t the world cooperating?!). If you pictured Jian-Yang from Silicon Valley with a marker on a whiteboard, you’re like us - with a vision of China as shown to us by the western media.
Burning the vaxx candle from all sides: At least things look good from a vaccine point of view (Oxford, India’s, South Korea’s). Things are looking especially good for insiders who have pocketed $1b nicely. The Serum Institute of India is planning 1b doses over the next year while the US calls dibs on 100m Pfizer doses.
Putting Lahorse before the cart: Pakistan’s curve is bending much like an outswinger. Would not mind being told to go to Pakistan now.
EUnity: In some positive news though, the EU finalised a landmark 750b euro stimulus package, financed by bonds that will be sold collectively rather than by individual countries.
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LinkedOut
First, this mind-blowing piece of journalism (and design) that shows how the world’s population will be reshaped thanks to climate change.
Remote work could destroy Silicon Valley and its much-hyped serendipity.
Not exactly an article, but a report - UNDP says the virus cases could be slowed if the poorest received some form of basic income. Heck, the pandemic might be the moment for a UBI. It was even recently deployed in the US.
The alternate Facebook where bots run free.
And the real Facebook where employees feel ashamed of what they’ve done.
That’s all for this week. If you’d like, you can get in touch: Instagram (Chuck | Tony), Twitter (Chuck | Tony), email. And again, if you REALLY like us and can afford to, consider supporting us on UPI, Instamojo or Patreon. Until next week, may you be woken up just in time for a work meeting by a surprise call from Amazon delivery. Bye!